


up close (and a little too personal)

by elegantstupidity



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: F/M, Missing Scene, Pining, Pre-Relationship, Trapped In A Closet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-28 19:25:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17793299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elegantstupidity/pseuds/elegantstupidity
Summary: On the scale of upsetting things that had happened to her in her life, getting stuck in a closet with Ted Mullens shouldn't even register.If only Alexis's stupid heart had gotten the memo.





	up close (and a little too personal)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Fmnds](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fmnds/gifts).



Alexis was not going to lose her cool. She had been stuck in much worse situations than this, and always come out on the other side. 

(Hello, Ivan Petrokov and his awful “summer lodge” in Krasnodar. Yeah, right. Alexis knew a compound when she saw one. Ugh. Those Russian oil guys were so predictable. She'd picked up a little Russian and an excellent vodka palate, but otherwise, that summer had been a complete bust.)

This was not going to be the thing that broke her.

Really, it wasn’t so bad. She wouldn’t even need a dummy passport or the intervention of the U.S. Embassy to get out of this. Just a set of keys that were, like, super inconveniently located on the other side of this locked door, but that was what David was for.

If he could ever actually show up, that is.

Because even if this all wasn't the absolute worst thing to happen to her this week (that definitely had to be Twyla’s sudden penchant for turnip-inspired smoothies at the diner), being stuck in a cluttered, mostly dark—one of the bulbs had burned out; someone should really get on fixing that—supply closet at her job, hadn't exactly topped her list of fun weekend activities.

Then again, as Alexis restlessly shifted her weight from foot to foot and accidentally brushed up against the person stuck in the closet with her, she might have to reassess her definition of _absolute worst_.

Because, as her luck would have it, it was Ted stuck in here with her. Ted. Her ex-boyfriend/sort of ex-fiancé/current boss. That Ted.

Ted, who was like, 1000% off-limits, she reminded herself for maybe the tenth time since getting stuck half an hour ago.

Although... This new cologne he'd started wearing was super yummy. It filled the small space and wound itself into Alexis's in a way she couldn't possibly ignore. It was one thing when she was out at the reception desk, chatting with clients, and Ted was in the exam room with their pets. It was only when he brought his little furry friends back out into the lobby that she ever got a whiff of him. Delicious whiffs. Way better than the body spray she'd tried to throw away about four times when they dated, but it had never gotten to her like it was now.

Plus, not to sound shallow or anything, but Ted clearly had been hitting his workouts, like, really hard. That bicep pressed against her arm was probably more than capable of picking her up and—

Alexis bit down on her lip and shifted her weight back to the other foot. She was not going to pounce on her ex-boyfriend in this supply closet. Although, they did have a couple pretty fun memories in here. She was pretty sure a "working lunch" meant something very different than what she and Ted used to do, but it wasn't as if he didn't get straight to business.

“So,” Ted said, trying to sound upbeat, “any idea when David’s going to get here?”

“Oh, umm…” She looked down at her phone, but there were no new messages since the one her brother had sent with just a string of crying laughing emojis to her panicked request for help. The clinic wasn't even open; they were only here to do a quick inventory. It wasn't as if they could just wait for a customer to come in and find them, and it wasn't as if their mom or dad would notice and come looking. But of course David had to be a dick about it anyway. “I think he was picking up some vegan soy candles from Elmdale? But he should be back soon.”

He _better_ be back soon. Alexis knew exactly where he kept his favorite sweaters and just what shade of purple his face turned when he found holes in them.

"Right." He sank down and leaned against one of the metal shelves, stretching his legs out in front of him. Apparently, he was ready for a long wait.

Ordinarily, Alexis preferred a nice, silk cushion or a hand-woven rug when she had to sit on the floor, but dusty linoleum wasn't the end of the world.

Out of curiosity, he swiped a finger against the ground and held it up to inspect. Even in the dim light—Ted really should change that bulb because maybe if everything was bright and shiny, sitting nearly shoulder to shoulder with him wouldn't feel quite so intimate, so dangerous—it wasn't hard to see the dust bunny she'd picked up. Automatically, her nose wrinkled. "Ew, Ted. You should really fire whoever does your cleaning because this is gross."

"Well, technically," he said, just a little hesitant, "you're supposed to do the sweeping up in here and the lobby."

"Oh." Alexis blinked. Had she ever swept the floor before? Probably not, but it couldn't be that hard. "Then I will get right on that."

Ted chuckled. "I'm sure you will."

Alexis had heard that combination so many times in her life. The laugh and then the condescending agreement with whatever she'd just said, like just because she was a certified babe, nothing she says was worth anything.

It was different with Ted, though. He was laughing, yes, but it didn't fill her with the burning desire to do something petty or rash. It was understanding, sweet even. And the way he said, "I'm sure you will," it was as if he really did believe it. He believed her.

She shut her eyes, hoping that maybe it would also shut out the sting of regret. When she'd broken up with him, she'd thought Ted was too sweet, too kind. Now, she was pretty sure there was no such thing.

Ted might be perfect. Too bad she'd already lost her chance.

Realizing that the silence had stretched out too long, Alexis pasted a sunny smile on her face. Before she could say anything, though, light flooded the tiny room.

She and Ted both flinched and squinted up at the person silhouetted in the door.

"Okay, please do not ever tell me how you got stuck in here," David said. He dangled the ring of keys at Ted, who bounded to his feet. Alexis followed, just a bit slower.

"Well, it's a pretty funny story," Ted enthused, just shy of babbling. "I keep the tranquilizers in here, so the door locks automatically."

"Super funny," David drawled, looking incredulous when his sister sent him a withering glare.

Ted pressed on regardless. "Anyway Alexis swore she saw a mouse, so I came to check because Timmy Wieghaus swore he lost one of his pet snake's meals in the clinic last week, and I must've knocked the doorstop out of the way. Bam! Stuck in the closet."

"Mm. Yeah, I don't have much experience with that."

Ted blinked and smiled, head tilting to the side like a confused, little bird. "Right," he said, taking the keys off David and heading out to make sure everything was all right in the clinic.

Alexis and her brother were left, sizing each other up, in the closet. David's eyebrows climbed his forehead, and he didn't even try to fight his stupid, smug smirk.

“Shut _up_ , David," she huffed, feeling more defensive than the situation warranted.

"I didn't say anything!"

"You didn't have to," she snarled, stalking out of her prison and back into the real world. Ted looked up and smiled at her from the reception desk, and Alexis managed a weak—but still stunning, get real—grin back. It was either that or give in to the way her heart thudded against her chest, sharp and aching.

Oh, no. 

Even as she continued to smile at her boss/ex-fiancé, only one thought swam through Alexis's head:

_If only Twy's turnip-banana smoothie had taken her out when it had the chance._


End file.
